BE SENSITIVE TO YOUR LEADERS

• October 30, 2023
• Adrienne Botha
• no comments

A litany of leadership material is available on the market, all of which prescribe to leaders what they should do and how they should behave.  No adequate material exists that deals with factors that place undue demands on their time.  We are inclined to disassociate ourselves from the reality that leaders have emotions and that these should not be disregarded and certainly, insensitivity towards them is prevalent.  Albeit it that this ‘insensitivity’ is an unintended consequence of the good intentions of publishers of content.

Being an avid reader and possessing a creative and enquiring mind, I do not readily accept the norm.  I prefer to have a holistic view on the subject matter and to unearth gaps in theories, or put it another way, to explore the practical application of theories.  My aim is to contribute to and to create practical academic value for the subject matter.  Based on my experience and from the position of both leader and employee, I am equipped to share information that deals with employee factors, and other factors, that have an adverse effect on leaders, whether they show it or not.

At the outset, it is imperative that I clarify that my intention of this paper is not to denigrate or disrespect the contribution of other authors.  I value and appreciate their contribution to the world of business development.  Therefore, when I refer to material, I ask you to bear this fact in mind.  I am not criticizing but adding to the subject matter.  For the sake of convenience, I refer to leaders in the male gender, but this term is to be used interchangeably for females.  No offence meant ladies – I am a female.

I have the view that published material prescribing behavioral standards to leaders is insensitive, bordering on bullying – as I said above, this being an unintended consequence of a good intention and directed from the stance of output required from a leader to his team, and not from the team’s perspective to the leader. There is insufficient advice available to leaders regarding leading recalcitrant employees or non-performers. The literature available assumes that all employees are operating from a perfect stance, and that the leader, if adopting a 5, 7, 9 12, 20 or 25 step approach, can lead his team to success.

The following material on leadership and the characteristics that a leader requires to follow is:

• 1.2 billion articles on the net
• 479 million published books
• 288 million podcasts
• 1 billion on YouTube

I think that we can safely agree that this topic has been exhausted.  The material available delivers the same or similar message – all packaged differently.  Let’s unpack some leadership quotes which ae meant to inspire Leaders:

• “Leadership is about the team—the culture they keep and embrace, it’s about empathy for your customers, clients, employees, and the communities where you do business, it’s about doing the right thing for the right reasons, being confident enough to take risks and responsible enough to think of those who your decisions and risks may affect.” 

There are many words in this inspirational quote, most of which are demanding in the extreme on one person. All focus is on the leader and nobody else in the team – the leader must feel overwhelmed by this expectation.

• “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” 

No pressure leaders – just ensure that your family never falls ill, that you have not had a death in the family. Always pitch up bright and cheerful and cheerfully consistent no matter the circumstances.

• “You are not here merely to make a living. You are here to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world.”

Dear Leader, don’t stress, save the world’s problems, and remember to deliver the results expected of you. 

• “Keep your fears to yourself but share your courage with others.”

How is it possible for leaders not to share concerns with the team?   It is the team who should be at his side taking him through both good and bad times – that is what builds camaraderie and that is one way that employees can support the leader.  Is the message here that “big boys don’t cry?”

• “Good leaders possess self-awareness, garner credibility, focus on relationship-building, have a bias for action, exhibit humility, empower others, stay authentic, present themselves as constant and consistent, become role models and are fully present.”

This list is exhausting, we cannot expect leaders to be superhuman. Imagine one person being able to deliver in term of this expectation!

It is a fact that leaders are expected to be brave, strong, courageous, consistent, wise, insightful, creative, and unwavering in their commitment to the human aspects of a business. Let us review the foundation of the principles that govern leadership and from whence they came.

The basic building blocks of leadership theory and the period of practical application thereof were founded 45 – two hundred thousand years ago. This is according to the earliest archaeological evidence interpreted by some scholars and is suggestive of the emergence of religious ideas traced to the Middle and Lower Palaeolithic periods. Some scholars hold the view that the first religion dates track to 3,000 years ago. I mention this because all the requirements to be obey, to show kindness and empathy, to wisely lead your team, to train your team and to be an honourable leader, are contained in religious material.

Compliance with these laws will make you a great leader. The content matter has not changed with the passage of time. Some leaders are charismatic on the stage, others know how to talk the talk, others have the knack of presentation, but it is all the same messages. ‘Love Your Neighbour’ – so yes, you do need to be passionate about your team, but they in turn must show you the same passion. The Bible has many teachings of leaders taking their tribes through war and discusses the strategy deployed.

The Book “The Art of War” is estimated to have been written between 475 and 221 B.C.E., during the Warring States period – that is 2,373 years ago. It is an incredible account of leadership ability and strategy and reflects the fact that since that time, leaders are expected to be lean, mean, strategic fighting machines, but I find no teachings that instruct leaders not to display their emotions and certainly no restrictions are placed on leaders to accept less than acceptable results from their teams.

So how can we valuably contribute to the wonderful topic of leadership? One way is to understand and accept that leaders face many challenges and that they cannot be expected to lead their team constantly and relentlessly, with a smile on their face. We need to accept the fact that circumstances external to the company, influence their ability or mood and we need to show patience and support to them. Leaders are expected to leave their personal problems at home! It is not possible to lead with authenticity when feelings must be ignored. The team, however, expect leaders to be empathetic to their circumstances!

By understanding the practical challenges that leaders face and by considering the inaccurate methodology deployed to measure their success, we will only then competently be able to add value to the wonderful world of leadership.

It is easy to measures financial success factors, but some methodologies used to determine their effectiveness as leaders is open to debate. Consider a tool called the 360-degree leadership evaluation. This process is biased, unfair, and impractical. Being an anonymous process, is where the danger lies. The staff are each compelled to submit an individual account of their idea of their leader’s style of leadership.

Due to the anonymous nature, people are inclined to criticize, judge, and rate a leader inaccurately and based on their expectations. The assessments do not request employees to declare their employment record which could expose performance management processes and other deliverable issues. Consider the example of a leader managing a non-performer, or somebody that is frequently absent from work – The staff member/s are hardly likely to accurately report on the leadership style of their leader. I have witnessed people’s careers being killed because of this process. There is a fine line between being a great leader and a leader who expects commitment and results. Sadly, a consequence of this incorrect measurement system translates into the calculation of the amount of performance bonus to be paid to the leader.

I recall an issue which I had with an external auditing firm when the company I was working with went through their annual supplier compliance audit. These audits cover areas such as minimum pay, employee safety, sexual harassment, and other areas. We received a non-compliance record as there were no anonymous complaint boxes places throughout the business, from reception to factory. I absolutely refused to comply with their requirement. In circumstances where you have quality control issues and time keeping issues in a manufacturing environment which is fraught with error, it is simply not practical or real, to invite employees to rate their supervisor. Their input will result in the company receiving a qualified audit report. This debate with the auditor representing the customer was escalated to their head office in America. It took a while, but I managed to persuade them to adjust their approach. I was simply not prepared to unfairly demotivate the leadership team of the company.

So, we have discussed the expectations and demands that we place on leaders, the foundation of the teachings as well as methodology deployed to determine their success.  I will now delve into the last component of this topic which deals with the human side of leaders.  It relates to what the team can do for leaders and what leaders can do for themselves.

I love Jack Welch’s contribution to this topic when he states:

“Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others.”

This is the reality of the situation. For a leader to be able to create, strategize and innovate, he should possess a healthy and energetic state of mind, and body. This can only be achieved by completely extracting yourself from the office for a period. Each period varies according to personal preference and ability to be able to tune out of life for a while. By tuning out, I mean having zero contact with work. I believe that companies should be compelled to support their leaders in this quest by providing not only financial means, but also extra annual leave to accomplish this task.

The process of reset is unique to everyone, and an abundance of literature is available to guide a leader through the process. It usually involves activities such as isolation, change of diet, exercise, and change of habits. The Japanese have a wonderful destress method called ‘Forest Bathing.’ This involves immersing yourself in nature without company. If the ocean is what relaxes you, then find a place at the ocean to go into a state of hibernation.

Amazing things happen when you allow your mind to declutter. It then becomes possible to look at matters clearly and the paths to your imagination and vision are open to fresh ideas.

“Where there is no vision, people will perish” – sound familiar?

Due to the stressful nature of what I do and in between assignments, I set time aside to reset. I respond well to this process when I isolate myself from telephone calls, social media, tv and other ‘distractions’ which prevent me from self-evaluating. You literally need to stop and smell the roses and listen to the birds. If you bury yourself in books or series binge, your reset process will not be successful. When there is no distraction, you give your body and mind a time to adjust to normality. This process requires brutal honesty with oneself and leads to the ability to discern what could have been done differently. For me, I find that the strangest memories come to my mind – it is all about healing. We are the sum of our choices and need to consider why we took the route that we did.

It is amazing what a clear mind can do. Unintentionally, my reset period resulted in a complete change of lifestyle and diet for me. For the last year now, I have meticulously maintained my new diet and lifestyle and have not even been slightly tempted to deviate therefrom. 90% of my diet is raw vegetarian, devoid of sugar, alcohol and caffein. Not only have my sleeping patterns improved, but I have more focus, clarity of mind, and energy. My life is now balanced and structured, and I find that I work less hours to achieve greater output and more importantly, I have clarity of mind to create and innovate.

Once you have managed to reset your mind, and dependant on your leadership pressures, it is wise to work with a Life Coach to sustain new habits. Life Coaches have many traits, but for me the most important one is their ability to make you question yourself and to consistently be fair to yourself. They guide you towards maintaining a positive and grateful outlook and the ability to cultivate curiosity.

It is a change of lifestyle, not a brief project it is a journey. Your power comes from focusing on what you can accomplish. You need to consider if you have set yourself personal self-achieving stretch goals. Absent goals, direction is lost, and time is wasted. I encourage you to read my blog ‘The Absent Leader.’

The last area to discuss is how the team can support the leader.  The obvious areas are those areas that can be measured:

• Be professional with customers.
• Assist your colleagues.
• Attain results required.

Etc.,

The less obvious areas are the more sensitive ones and are those where measurement is not possible.  This relates to behavior actions such as:

• Spreading of rumors
• Partaking in corporate politics
• Respect the leader’s time.
• Have a solutions-based attitude.
• Breach of confidentiality.
• Disloyal behavior.
• Putting your own interests before those of the leader.
• Breach of confidentiality.
• Disloyal behavior.

If we desire a perfect leader, we should create the perfect environment for him.

Thank you for reading this blog. Stay tuned for more insightful discussions on boosting your business’s success. Join us next week, and let’s keep growing together! And don’t forget to listen to my podcasts for in-depth insights on leadership and related topics.